ID: JUX-600
Actress: Saaya Nakamura
Release Date: 2015-05-25
Label: Madonna
Genres: AV Debut, Sports
Reviewer: Mr. Tan
Introduction
Dear readers, we’ve been lying to you. Our efforts here have thus far created the lie, one we’ve silently perpetuated for weeks now. I do hope you’ll forgive us. We’ve just gone along with the fiction we’ve created and have remained silent as it took root. It’s not quite as horrible as collusion with publishers to conceal putrid product until the masses have purchased, but it’s close. You see, dear readers, we’ve let you believe that all JAV is good. For that, we apologize.
Also, publishers, please feel free to email us at jav2dwest@gmail.com so we can work something out.
Histrionics and humor aside, it’s undeniably true that we deliberately started off on a positive note and have avoided mediocre and execrable films. It’s led to an impression of Japan as a paradise of bosom films, but we’ll correct that now.
The Actress
Saaya Nakamura is nothing to write home about. According to what I’ve understood, she’s a married physical education teacher and ex-volleyball player, so she’s ridiculously tall, a little shy of six feet. Now, one thing people have probably noticed about volleyball players – all their growth went into their height. As you’d expect, Saaya Nakamura is not an exception. Her figure resembles a bean pole, with nothing on top or on the bottom. Further, her face is not one to launch a thousand ships. In fact, I’m doubtful of how long it’s been since she hit the volleyball court in earnest, given her lack of the lady two-pack. Well, at least her legs seem to be there.
One thing I’ll say about JAV is that it’s a land of opportunity compared to the West. This means that as long as the talent fits with whatever theme the marketing department or casting director decides on for a given movie, she will be hired. However, that also means performance talent is optional, but more on that later.
Rating 2.0
The Performance
Alright, this is an AV Debut, but to hell with it. This was pretty awkward to watch and judging from how fast the introduction was, the director and his editing department agreed. We spend a total of six minutes interacting with our debuting Saaya Nakamura before one of the dudes paid to have sex with her enters to do so. He is performing the role of a fellow physical education teacher, so fine. Next, she… well, forgets about the audience.
You will have noticed in past reviews that I pay attention to how well the actress plays to the viewers, and Saaya Nakamura does not do a good job of that. It seems to me her main concession to that arena is to be as loud in the stereotypically JAV way possible. Audience appeal? She has a scene that starts with masturbation that could be could be counted as playing to the viewer, and she seems to do ok with it.
Rating 2.0
Story/Theme/Setting
The best part of the film is the reason it would catch your eye in the first place. The film opens with Saaya Nakamura going through the volleyball motions. Her movements are the smooth motions of an athlete familiar with her sport, while I also caught hints of boredom. Unsurprising, given how the crew assisting with creating the film would be unable to provide actual challenge. She even does a few more advanced skills for the hell of it, but… that’s it. That’s all the volleyball you get, about a minute and a half of exhibition.
There are two scenes in the volleyball court, one in a storage room, and two more in what look like a more traditional Japanese room, complete with sliding doors and tatami mats. The two scenes in the more Japanese room throw off the theme – if she’s a teacher, then where would these rooms be? Japanese schools usually aren’t equipped with traditional-looking rooms, except in tea ceremony clubs, but why would she be in there twice? Well, I don’t know enough Japanese to confirm if it’s because they’re disused, but it’s jarring.
Rating 3.0
Sexual Content
Must I comment on this? Can I not dismiss it with a meh? After heated consultations, Mr. White insists I must I must provide commentary similar in quality to what I’ve provided before, especially after he’s had to endure worse.
Very well, let’s get on with it. Build up is nearly non-existent here, and with debuts, that’s fatal. There’s no reason to anticipate, no momentum or build-up. It’s the film version of premature ejaculation. The first scene is ok. The sexual activity is routine, but there is one part of the scene that stands out. After the initial foreplay/groping, the actor decides he wants a blowjob. Rather than go for routine, he grabs a table, drags it over to the volleyball net, and shoves his penis into an opening at standing level to Saaya Nakamura. It’s actually a fairly macho act and the result is rather hot, since our debut idol’s main skill seems to be toward fellatio. The other fellatio scenes aren’t as good as this.
Speaking of, second scene opens with actress masturbation inside the storage room, where she at least tries to lay to the audience, then concludes with a blowjob. While the first actor was half a head shorter, this guy was a full head shorter. For such a tall lady, that hunched over position looked incredibly uncomfortable. Next two scenes break my minimum boob to ratio rule, with two actors giving Saaya Nakamura a full-body massage that involves oil molestation and fingering, then the succeeding scene is, as an astute reader can guess, the wrong kind of threesome, with the results ending up on her small breasts. Final scene is routine, ends on her face.
Rating 2.0
Overall
I think the major lesson here is you shouldn’t watch a film by its cover. I initially got this film during an aggressive stage of expansion for my collection. I thought the actress was pretty, based on the cover, but actually viewing resulted in severe disappointment. The end result was mediocre and her career ended up being a grand total of two films. If you have a fetish for tall chicks or volleyball chicks or MILF chicks, this should be an okay addition. Otherwise, don’t.
Rating: 2.5 C
Not Recommended, Fetishists Only
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